Back in the bar

Popo, at that moment was talking to Ms Rounds in her office.

‘Well, I’ve fired Jovelisi and we shouldn’t have to see his ugly face around here anymore,’ Ms Rounds said to her. ‘And really Popo, the next time you have any problems with the staff, just let me know immediately and I’ll take care of them. That is what you employ me for you know.’

‘Ah yes yes. Well, I tried to give that lazy boy a second chance. But I guess it was wasted. Anyway, I’m happy for the woman who dumped him online. She was very smart to see through him,’ Popo said.

‘I’ve never seen someone of your age work as hard as you do. Surely you should be retired and not working in a bar?’ Ms Rounds said in a mixture of admiration and disbelief. ‘You must be the only person I know who insists on working at seventy!’

‘Well some people don’t like not doing anything,’ Popo replied glibly. ‘Besides, its boring at home. I don’t want to sit down and watch tv all day or potter in the garden. I’m not meant for that!’

‘You nearly gave me a heart attack when I saw you trying to shift those boxes! Don’t ever do that again!’

Popo nodded. Then she smiled. ‘Oh well, it’s over now. I’m going to have my tea with the boy.’ She got up and left the office.

Ms Rounds watched her leave with a smile on her face. She’d never ever seen an old woman move as spritely as she did.

As Popo walked towards Jonathan, a muffled voice reached her ears.

‘You heard the boss. Don’t ever try and shift boxes again old woman! Or you’ll be responsible for murder if she gets a heart attack!’

‘Found your way under the floor boards did you?’ Popo muttered under her breath.

‘Well of course. What else would you expect of a rat? I wouldn’t be a very good one if I couldn’t get underground would I?’

‘And by the way, I hope you feel guilty about leaving me in the rain last night. I could have drowned out there!’

‘Well, if you truly are the rat you say you are, then you would have found a dry spot to sleep,’ Popo told him flatly. ‘Now, disappear.’

‘Hmph. As if you can see me!’ Rat replied indignantly. However, he remained quiet after that.

‘Hello Jonathan,’ Popo said when she reached him. ‘I hear you’ve no school today. Isn’t that nice?’

For the first time that day, Jonathan grinned. It was a toothy one.

‘Popo!’ he went. ‘Did you hear about Jovelisi as well? Your boss finally fired him!’

‘Hmmm. Yes, I heard he said some very bad things to you. I hope you didn’t take it to heart. He’s just a mindless gorilla who has no idea of what he’s saying,’ Popo said, giving him a concerned look.

‘Nah. I just ignored him. Mum said that I shouldn’t pay attention to people who say things like that,’ Jonathan told her.

‘Your mum’s right. It causes unnecessary aggravation and brings to light the birth of another idiot into this world,’ Popo said, giving a little cackle. ‘You are a very intelligent boy Jonathan. Your mum would be very proud to know that you did not react to stupid comments like those. Sometimes even the oldest and mature of us allow words to hurt us when they shouldn’t have to.’

‘Jovelisi’s a very bitter person isn’t he?’ Jonathan asked.

‘The lazy usually are Jonathan. They see the riches but not the sacrifices. Anyway, enough about that brainless oaf. How come your parents didn’t pick you up from school?’

Popo sat down and sipped her tea appreciatively. ‘Well?’ she asked when Jonathan didn’t reply immediately.

‘Well, my mum’s had an accident and will make her way down here soon. Dad’s stuck in a meeting,’ Jonathan answered.

‘I see. Well, I’m glad your mother is all right. Still, it might take a while before she gets here so perhaps if you like, I can tell you a chapter or two. What say?’ Popo said.

Jonathan nodded enthusiastically. ‘Great. I can’t wait to know more about the scarecrow. He’s so cool. He just blows Rat away!’

Popo nearly spat out her tea and instead, decided to choke.

‘Popo are you okay?’ Jonathan asked in a worried voice. He even got up and went to her side.

From somewhere in the background, a voice reached out.

‘Blows me? Blows me? Just what do you think I am you moron?’

Popo had another coughing fit and stamped the floor really hard. Jonathan was thoroughly concerned now and started hitting her on the back to unclog her pipes. After a few minutes, Popo calmed down and waved Jonathan aside.

‘I’m all right now. Thank you Jonathan.’

‘Geesh. I thought you were going to die there Popo. What happened?’

‘Tea went down the wrong pipe. Happens sometimes. Don’t worry, I can’t die like that,’ Popo answered.

From somewhere in the background, it could have even been the walls, a voice echoed out.

‘Really. Could have had me fooled there. I thought I’d have to crawl down your throat for a-’

Popo banged the wall really hard. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at her.

‘Cockroach, cockroach that’s all. Nothing to worry about!’ Popo said, cackling cheerfully.

‘Now Jonathan,’ she said with slightly teary eyes. ‘Shall we get on with that story then?’

The Bus RIde

The bus ride into town was something to remember. There were quite a few students who were standing in the aisle, hanging onto seats and rail bars above their heads. The tarpaulin that served as windows were drawn down tightly and even though there was a transparent square for them to look out, Jonathan couldn’t see a thing. The rain was pelting down so hard that he couldn’t even see out the driver’s windscreen.

However, he didn’t think this lack of view would affect the bus driver. Most of the drivers in Fiji drove with their eyes closed anyway. The bus went over a big pot hole and all the children in the bus shouted as some skidded across wet floors, bumped into each other and even fell (deliberately) onto others they liked and disliked.

‘Oilei! Driver – you trying to break our bums or what?’ a student called out. ‘Oi, can you hear us or not?’

‘It’s no use Peli,’ someone else answered. ‘He’s not listening to us. Can’t you see the old socks in his ears?’

‘I knew there was something funny about his looks today,’ the first student called Peli replied. ‘And look, he’s even got his raincoat on. Oilei, there’s even goggles around his head. Is he planning to take us for a swim or what?’

‘Maybe he plans to drown us in one of these potholes,’ another student shouted. ‘Oi driver watch where you driving man! That last pothole was the size of the Olympic pool man!’

‘Man this is great. No school today and most likely all week!’ Another student called out.

‘Great for you maybe but not for me,’ someone else said in response. The voice was a little glum.

‘Oso.. what you complaining for Wais? Oh yeah I forgot – you have to shave your auntie’s beard when you get home right?’

The whole bus burst into laughter.

‘You are one to laugh. I seen your mother you know. Her moustache was bigger than your father’s!’ The boy called Wais rebutted. There was a fresh uproar of laughter.

‘Ok ok. Let’s not talk about our mothers and aunties anymore!’ The perpetrator said loudly. ‘We wanna sleep tonight and don’t wanna dream of plucking their beards out.’

Murmurs of agreement spread throughout the bus. At some point or the other, each of them had to endure a loving female relative’s embrace and suffer the harsh scrape of their facial attributes. It wasn’t pleasant.

The bus hit another pothole and the students lurched to one side and then the other. Jonathan grimaced as three students squashed him against the window before releasing him. He regretted having chosen the seat right next to the window then – it meant that he was the furthest in and didn’t have the safety of the aisle to escape to. But then again, he didn’t have to endure sweating arm pits from those students who were standing. Anyway, his stop was coming up soon so he didn’t have to endure it for long.

At last the bus pulled to a stop and Jonathan disembarked with a grateful sigh. He shielded his face against the rain as much as he could with his bag and ran towards the bar. It loomed in front of him, its doors promising him dry warmth and hopefully, a story from Popo. He pushed the door open and entered.

‘Oi boy! Who said you can come in here? Get out or I’ll call the police for skipping school!’

Jonathan recognised the voice. He’d heard it before being used on Popo although it had no effect on her. Jovelisi. The big, dumb and lazy man who thought he was a security guard but really, was no more than a door man who never opened doors. Instead, he spent his time on the internet trying to find himself a wife. Jonathan faced him.

‘School’s been cancelled because of the flood,’ he said. ‘I’m supposed to wait here for my mother.’

However, for no reason as usual, Jovelisi was in a nasty mood.

‘Oh we have a smart mouth here. Some white boy who thinks he can tell me what to do eh? Well, get lost! This place is for paying customers only so tell your mother to find you another nursery.’

‘You can tell her yourself,’ Jonathan said calmly. ‘I’m not going to disobey her and I shall wait here until she arrives.’

‘What did you say?’ Jovelisi suddenly shouted, his face pulling into the ugliest frown. Jonathan could even see his nostril hairs. ‘You get out of here now or I shall throw you out you white, cheeky smart mouth! I’ve seen you talking to that old china woman. You and her, both lazy good for nothings while people like me have to work hard and - ’

‘And what Jovelisi?’ a cold, hard voice asked from behind him.

Jovelisi’s face visibly changed. It went from fierce to kicked dog and he straightened up, almost humbly to face the newcomer. His boss.

She was a tall, mixed woman of Fijian, European descent and right then, she looked furious.

‘What were you saying to the boy Jovelisi?’ she asked coldly.

‘I was um..telling him to leave Ms.Rounds,’ Jovelisi replied. ‘He’s trying to cause trouble. He’s supposed to be at school.’

‘Oh? And what were you saying about the china woman who right now is shifting boxes in the back that you were supposed to be doing?’

Jovelisi visibly paled.

Ms. Rounds continued speaking. ‘I thought I heard you call her a good for nothing lazy woman isn’t that right? And because she’s just so lazy, you made her, a seventy year old woman, move heavy boxes so that you can look for women on the internet? And then, you saw it fit to throw out a young boy in the rain when he’s supposed to wait for his mother? I think I’ve heard enough Jovelisi. Please collect your pay from my office and don’t come back here again. Ever! Or I’ll have you thrown out.’

Jovelisi’s face transformed once more into an ugly person.

‘You can’t do this to me! You have no right to kick me out and keep that old china - ’ a hand came across his face, leaving a red mark. Jovelisi growled and leapt forward but was stopped abruptly by a large, dark Fijian man that appeared out of nowhere. He twisted Jovelisi’s arm behind him and before he could scream out in pain, the dark man bundled him forward and outside.

Jonathan and the woman watched as the dark man said some things in Jovelisi’s ear and then witnessed the bully fall to the ground, pleading. The dark man pointed a finger indicating that Jovelisi leave and the bully did so with relief. Within seconds, he had disappeared around the corner. The dark man walked back into the bar.

‘I don’t think we’ll see him ever again,’ he told them.

‘Good!’ Ms Rounds replied. She looked down at Jonathan.

‘Are you ok?’ she asked.

Jonathan nodded. Ms Rounds smiled at him. ‘He was such a nasty person I know. But unfortunately very clever. I couldn’t fire him without a good reason and you provided it to us. Do you want a hot chocolate while you wait for your mother? It’ll be my treat.’

Jonathan nodded and smiled his thanks. Ms Rounds headed to the bar to order his drink and so he made his way to the corner table by the window. It was cosy there and he’d be able to see his mother when she arrived. The waitress brought his hot chocolate over and placed another cup of tea on the table.

‘Um excuse me but I didn’t order the cup of tea,’ Jonathan told her.

‘Oh don’t worry,’ the waitress replied. ‘It’s for Popo. You’ll be having tea with her!’ She threw him a friendly smile before walking off.

Jonathan looked about for Popo. She was nowhere to be seen. Strange, he thought. How did she know he was there?

A Palm Drive

I meant to publish this one earlier but never got around to it till today. Yes, it's one of those incidents that deserves a mention occasionally. About three weeks ago as I was on my way to work, I came across a large crowd standing outside the internet shop that I usually pass. Sad to say, my curiosity was at once alerted, especially when I spotted a very large, leafy palm tree in the background.

As I approached nearer, I was quite surprised to see that the palm was actually lying across a car and that it looked vaguely familiar. This was because, the place where I work has a lush garden of tropical beauties.....8 floors up!! I then met a friend of mine who was observing the incident and he told me that the palm had fallen from the 8th story of my office. I was quite shocked of course. If the palm had indeed fallen from my office, this would mean serious implications (like getting our behinds sued!) so I quickly rushed to my office to determine if this was true. It wasn't thankfully!

There used to be a palm tree that grew outside on the ground floor of my office building. It was that poor palm that got careened into and now decorated the white car. And when I did think about it, I realised that my office grew no large plants therefore it could not have fallen off 8 stories. As for the driver, he was rumoured to have suffered a heart attack thus crashing into the tree before bravely driving his car to a quieter street out of harm's way. That was indeed a clever, brave thing to do.

However, he looked more shocked to me than heart stricken, as if the tree had come to life and attacked him rather than his heart. The poor man was staring at his car, more than likely thinking about his insurance or lack of. My heart went out to him.

Anyways, have a look at this new floral car. :)

Heavy Rain

‘Dan? Dan, come and take a look at the weather. Do you think it’s wise to send Jonathan to school today?’ Katie called out to her husband.

Jonathan’s father walked over to the window where his wife was looking out worriedly.

‘It’s typical Suva weather darling. It rains all the time like this here. We are not in Europe anymore. We get real rain here and not miserable drizzles,’ Dan told his wife.

‘But have you seen the weather reports? It’s unnaturally cold outside!’ Katie exclaimed. ‘The weather reports say that it’s never happened before.’

‘Yes and they are talking about the temperature dear – not the rain,’ Dan said. ‘The rain is nothing unusual in Suva. As for the wind, Jonathan’s going to be indoors all day isn’t that right son?’

‘Yes dad,’ Jonathan replied. He had his back pack on. ‘Are we going now?’

His father downed his tea in one gulp, got up and kissed his wife on the cheek before making his way to Jonathan. ‘Have you kissed your mum goodbye?’ he asked.

‘Way before you dad,’ Jonathan replied.

‘Well all right. See you later mum! We’re off!’

As they drove along the sea wall to Suva Grammar School, Jonathan gazed at the sea. It was angry and black and lashed at the walls that kept it from coming further inland. On their right, the vast school grounds were already flooding. A question popped up in his mind.

‘Dad, what happens if we get a flood warning? Will you be able to pick me up?’ he asked.

‘I should think so if nothing else comes up. Otherwise, call your mum. You have your mobile on you don’t you?’

‘Yeah. Otherwise, do I catch the school bus into town as usual?’ Jonathan said.

‘Yes. Those big buses are fairly safe. Just use your head, get to a safe place and give your mum or me a call okay?’

‘Okay dad.’ The car pulled into the school driveway. Jonathan bid his father goodbye and got out of the car. It was still raining hard and he ran in, all the way to his classroom.

Classes proceeded as normal for the first half of the day but it was hard to hear what the teachers were saying because the rain was so loud outside that it drowned out their voices.

Just before the lunch bell, their class teacher, Miss Satala interrupted their maths class looking slightly flustered.

‘Kids,’ she said. ‘The headmaster has decided to cancel classes for the rest of the day and instead, you are to make your way back home. Most of your parents are being called as we speak and the school buses will be here shortly. So for those of you who live far away, you should get on those buses immediately. There are parents driving into the school yard now and for the students who normally get picked up, please wait in the lobby by the entrance. That’s it – pack your things and get ready to leave.’

Some kids yelled with glee. However, Jonathan did not join them. Miss Satala called him over.

‘Jonathan,’ she said as he approached her. ‘I’ve tried to call your father but the officials say he’s in a very important meeting and can’t be disturbed. Can you try calling your mum instead? We don’t have her number.’

Jonathan nodded. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialled his mother’s number.

‘Hello, Jonathan is that you?’ her voice came over the receiver.

‘Yes mum. Mum, classes have been cancelled today and students are going home. Can you pick me up? Dad’s in a meeting and can’t come.’

‘Jonathan, listen carefully. I had a little accident driving to the supermarket and I won’t be able to drive down. I need to go down to the police station to give my statement as well. Can you catch the school bus into town and I shall see if I can catch a cab as soon as I can? Otherwise, mummy shall send a diplomatic car for you okay?’

‘All right mum. I’ll get on the school bus. Is it okay if I wait for you at the corner of Gordon street where the bar is mum? Do you know where it is?’

‘Is that where you said the little Chinese woman was?’ His mum asked.

‘Yes mum. I’ll wait for you there.’

‘I’ll try to be there as soon as possible sweetheart. If I can’t make it, I’ll call your father all right? Love you dear.’

Jonathan put his phone away, packed his bag and headed out to wait for the school bus. He was glad that he was going to see Popo.

Popo and Rat

Popo stepped out of the bar onto the pavement, bag under arm. There was a strong wind blowing and she looked up in surprise. There was a biting edge to it, uncommon in Fiji. Mango and palm trees were swaying their leafy heads violently and overhead, dark clouds were gathering at phenomenal speed.

‘Can you zip the bag please? It’s getting breezy in here!’ a muffled voice called out from her handbag. Popo ignored the voice and began walking. The bar where she worked was situated at the bottom of a hill and she was making her way up. She sighed. So much for being a tough old woman, her bones and muscles were begging for retirement.

Her sigh did not go unnoticed. ‘I’m surprised you continue to push yourself like this. You know your body can’t take it anymore. Why can’t you just be a normal old woman and catch the bus? Or get one of those golf cart thingies?’

‘I don’t like waiting that’s why!’ Popo grumbled. ‘And I don’t like being squashed next to sweaty, smelly people on their way home from work. And my body is not done in yet – while it can walk, it will walk!’

‘Yeah right. You’re just to embarrassed to admit that you can’t drive one of them golf cart thingies. I know you took one of them for a test drive without telling me and you must have crashed it because why else would you not get one for yourself?’

‘And by the way, do you know how painful it is for the normal, young people in this world to see you struggle up this hill? You sure know how to make everyone around you feel guilty!’

‘Well if the young people of today chose to ride in buses or cabs when their houses are not more than a fifteen minute walk away, then that’s their decision to die younger. I am going to walk!’ Popo said determinedly.

The wind howled and Popo shivered. She was not the only one. Rat shivered in the bag.

‘Where are we? The north pole or what?’ he called out.

‘I don’t know but at least it keeps me from sweating,’ Popo answered. ‘Now if you can just shut up for ten minutes, I’ll be able to get us home.’

Rat obliged and it was a quiet walk home. Popo finally unlocked the door to her humble wooden house along Knolly street and closed it behind her. She placed her handbag on the kitchen counter and Rat scampered out of it. He ran straight to the tv remote control and hopped onto it. The television came on.

‘Hey old woman! We just in time for the weather news,’ he called out.

‘And today Fiji experienced the most unusual weather conditions with temperatures dropping down to as low as 15 degrees where just an hour ago, the Nadi weather station recorded 35 degrees in the west. This unusual occurrence coincides with rising sea levels in some of the low lying areas around the coast…’

‘Is this a coincidence I wonder?’ Popo asked aloud. ‘Could it be that the key is here?’

‘What? The rising sea levels?’ Rat asked. ‘It’s called global warming old lady. Very common today as the big industrial worlds pollute the air and oceans with their progress. Nothing supernatural about that.’

‘We’ve searched all over Rat. There’s not many countries left in this world,’ Popo said.

‘Tell me about it. The lines on your face is a painful reminder!’

He dodged a flying saucer followed by an old slipper, a loaf of bread, a hand of bananas and then……

‘No! Not my cheesecake!’ Rat screamed in horror as Popo whipped out his beloved dessert and flung it at him. Instinctively, Rat dodged and it went splat on the wall.

‘I’ll trust you to clean every single bit of it, every crumb in oh…say five minutes or else you are sleeping outside tonight!’ Popo said coldy. She left the room.

‘Geesh – she has no sense of humour at all,’ Rat grumbled after she left. He surveyed the creamed cheese on the wall. ‘Oh well, better get to work.’

He opened his mouth as wide as he could, ambled to the wall and tried to scrape the cheese off with his teeth. It didn’t work.

‘Hmmm perhaps if I use my tail…..’

That night, Rat slept outside.

Something so small.....

The Miracle Ant

I usually try not to make this blog an account of my personal experiences, opting to stick to the stories I write as originally intended. However, there are times when things happen to you, that touch you in some way that you just have to tell whoever you can about it. This was the case with me 3 nights ago.

I was preparing dinner and had pulled out the pak choi (cabbage) that had been in the fridge for several days. Upon slicing it up, I discovered a dead colony of ants on my chopping board, having most obviously, died from the cold temperature in the fridge. It’s not uncommon in Fiji, to find ants everywhere and these ones had decided to take a tour around pak choi city. Unfortunately for them, pak choi city was harvested and duly ended up in my fridge where after several days in a much colder climate, they were struck down by hypothermia and died.

Except for one plucky, lucky little bugger! As I was about to place my chopping board under the tap, I spotted movement and then there he was. The miracle ant that had survived extreme conditions, watched his fellowmen die and yet refusing to pass on. What a brave little bugger.

I was so moved by the ant’s determination to live, trying futilely to drag itself off the wet chopping board that I intervened with mother nature and saved it. I slid it onto my finger nail, rested the little fella onto a dry tea towel and delivered crumbs of sweet bread to it. Then I waited to see another miracle unfold.

Within seconds, the ant recovered tremendously! At first, it was a little wobbly on its feet but the smell of sugar and warm air must have injected a new life force into it. It went from wobbly to stodgy, from unaware to exploratory and then, it found its feet. The strength in it was just so amazing that you’d never have believed that it had been stuck on a cabbage leaf in the fridge for 3 days, surviving while all its mates died. Just so amazing.

I then transferred it to the pot plant outside which regularly gets fed with potato peels, pawpaw skin and other yummy food. I sincerely hope that the miracle ant found its haven there because really, he was the pluckiest little bugger of all.